| BayNVC |
|
BayNVC - Bay Area Nonviolent Communication
Self-Connection: Authenticity and Vulnerability For writing, reflection, buddy conversations or real life1. Exploring the choice not to share full honestya. Write down something you wish you could say to someone in your life, but for whatever reason you’ve chosen not to say it. Try not to edit it into "NVC language" or in any other way. Just write exactly what comes to mind or heart. b. What needs are you trying to meet by not sharing this with the person? c. What needs are you not meeting by not sharing this? Or in other words, what needs might be met by sharing it? d. Now imagine sharing this with the person (in NVC). Notice what feelings come up, and what needs those feelings are connected to that you imagine would be met or unmet. e. How do you feel and what needs arise after exploring these questions? Do you want to continue with the choice you have made or choose differently? (If any self-judgments arise, go into self-empathy for both the needs met and unmet with your choices.) 2. Giraffe "lies" Think of a situation in which you chose to use NVC but the words didn’t match your internal experience. In writing or with a partner (could be an empathy buddy if you have one), role play the situation and get more authentic, still taking full responsibility for your feelings and needs, but choose more honesty than you did previously. 3. Jackal honesty vs. giraffe honesty Think of a situation in which you have been honest with someone about something difficult, but you shared more of your evaluations/judgments than your feelings and needs. In writing or with a partner (could be an empathy buddy if you have one), get more vulnerable/honest about the feelings and needs behind whatever honesty you shared, and consider what requests you might have that may support more connection and honesty in this situation. |
|